Mama

I used to write some poems back in the day....I am not good at it, but there were some days all these thoughts were in my head and for some reason, I just had to put it on paper. This is a poem I wrote almost 4 months after my mom died of cancer.



Mama
1936-1994

There are still days that I can't believe you are gone,
And with my life, I have tried to move on.
There are times I feel sorry for myself and ask why?
And there are some days when all I want to do is cry.
I sometimes try to act as if nothing is wrong,
But the hurt I sometimes feel is so very strong.
I never told you enough of how I loved you,
And how sorry I was for any pain I put you through.
I never told you enough how much I really cared,
For all your love and talks that we shared.
You always sacrificed for the love of others,
I guess you felt that was the job of mothers.
Always willing to help, whatever the need,
Always willing to help with some small deed.
I called you Mama, but I also called you friend,
And I wasn't quite ready for that to end.
I miss you dearly and the girls do too,
But this was God's will, so we have to make do.
Life is hard, sometimes it's not fair,
For God's reasons are not always very clear.
Why did he take someone that I needed so much?
One that held me with her motherly touch?
Proms, graduations, and wedding days too,
Just won't be same without you.
God gave you new legs to walk on those streets of gold,
New legs that will never tire or grow old.
The cancer is gone, you are no longer in pain,
What was our loss, to heaven was gain.
So for now, I'll cling to the memories I hold so dear,
Until we meet each other again in the air.


My mom was such a blessing. I always thought my mom was perfect, even when she was alive. She had so much patience and hardly raised her voice. Let's not forget she had four teenagers at one time! My mom is who I credit my faith to. She ALWAYS took us kids to church. She was diagnosed with cancer on July 18, 1994 and died December 19, 1994. Four months from diagnosis to death. I can honestly say looking back, how good God was. While it was difficult not have much time, what a blessing that we did not have to watch my sweet mama deteriorate like some cancer patients do. One Saturday in October, we got a phone call that my mom went paralyzed from the waist down and from then on, she was either in the hospital or rehab. She never came home again. I kept expecting my mom to go "down-hill" - then I would "know" her time was coming....but that time never came, so it was still a shock when she died. I rotated every other day with my sister to visit and my sweet daddy never missed a day. My mom never complain about her situation or any of her pain. People went to encourage her, but walked away encouraged by her. I hope if I am ever in that kind of shape, that I will have the same testimony. I am sooooooo thankful that I have the reassurance of seeing my sweet mama again!





Her children arise up, and call her blessed.

Proverbs 31:28