I was born in a small town

Well, I don't know if I was actually born in a small town. I was born in Blytheville, Arkansas, but since the age of ten, I have lived in a small town. Tallassee to be exact. When I was younger, I yearned to grow up and move to a bigger city. Not Atlanta big, but certainly not Tallassee small. Turns out, I married a Tallassee man and the rest is history. I have come to love the small town living way of life. I have a sister in law that has only lived in big cities - think Denver and Seattle. She came to live in Kent, Alabama for a while and hated it. Kent makes Tallassee look like a metropolis, so I guess it is all about what you are used to. I have a friend that moved to Atlanta and she always complained how long it took to commute to work. Now, we aren't talking a lot of distance, it just all depended on how many wrecks were on the road that day. Nope, I don't think I would handle that very well. I like knowing that I can run to Walmart and if I don't get behind any slow pokes ( no passing on small town roads ), I can usually go and get back within 30 minutes.


My kids benefited from going to school in a small town. Most of the time, parents knew the teachers before they became our children's teacher. Most of the classes are small, so everybody knew everybody in their graduating class. Jamie had one of the biggest graduating classes to come through THS in awhile - 123 students.


I like the sense of caring that comes from being in a small town. Not too long ago, our community was shocked when a beloved elderly couple was brutally attacked in their home. This doesn't happen very often, and it stopped us all in our tracks. For a small moment in time, we were all mad and worried at the same time. There is no way of knowing this side of heaven how many prayers went up for this family from our small town. Watch when someone dies - the community opens up their arms to help. Or just let someone have a tragedy in their life and you will see the community open up their pocketbooks with fundraisers to help the family out. Come to our Relay for Life and you will be astonished how much money our small town can raise. Come to one of our football games and you might find yourself standing due to a sell out crowd.


I like the sense of knowing people in a small town, even if just a little bit. I see people that I don't really know, but know them when I see them. Community spirit is alive and strong in small town living. No matter how hard you try, it just can't be duplicated in big town living. Maybe there are just too many people that you can't get to know them all. Maybe there is just too much going on to get to know people. Too much hustle and bustle of big city life. I just know it isn't for me. I like visiting the big city, but don't care to live in one.


Ahhh, small town living. Oh, that is probably where they'll bury me.


A city that is set on a hill cannot be hid.
Matthew 5:14b

Unbelief

While doing my devotion, I came across a verse that made me stop and think. Matthew 21:22 says- And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive. What a promise to cling to! How many times have I prayed for something with little thought as to whether God would answer it? It's like we make a wish list and do our part in reciting it to God with little belief that He would answer it. I can remember a certain situation that I have prayed over, but if someone was to ask me, I would always answer " I doubt that is ever going to happen." That is nothing but unbelief. Why do I have no problem believing that God created the heaven and earth in 6 days, but think He can't handle my problems? I have not one ounce of unbelief when it comes to believing that Jesus was born of a virgin. I don't doubt one bit that God parted the Red Sea or that God made a whale to swallow up Jonah for three days only to spit him back out. The stories that make some people scoff at, I have no problem believing in faith. Why then do I have unbelief in my own life? If God says it, we can claim it. The key word is that verse is believing. Now, I know we can't expect God to answer our prayers when we ask amiss, but if I am asking for something that I know is God's will, then I am sometimes my own hindrance. I lack in the believing part. I am the one that limits God. We seem to have this idea of who God is, but our perception and His reality are not the same.


It is one thing to believe in God. There is so much overwhelming evidence that proves God existence. Just look at all the beautiful wonders of the world to or the way our bodies are designed. Even demons believe in God - but believing in Him is the difference. I think if God can keep the earth rotating around the sun every single day, I can trust him with my little life.


Lord, I believe; help thou my unbelief.
Mark 9:24

Stupid Mistake

So tonight, I made a stupid mistake. I knew I made it about 30 seconds after I did it. I could feel the looming terror in my chest when I realized what I did. Yep, I locked my keys in my car.

I have such a fear of locking my keys in my car, that I actually checked my purse twice to make sure my keys were in it. They were. I keep my church Bible in my car at all times. So, I get to church and grab my fruit, grab my Bible ( in a Bible cover with straps ) and sling it over my shoulder thinking it was my purse I guess. Out of habit, I manually lock the doors and then as I close the door, I click my clicker to make sure it beeps. That is when I realized it.

Now, I understand that in the scheme of things, the problem is not that big. Yes, I have a spare key, but it is in my wallet. I never, ever (before tonight ) leave my purse. My purse is like my security blanket. I always have it. I may lock my keys, but never my purse. My preacher tried so hard ( thanks Bro. Jim ) to open it, but couldn't. I tried to call a locksmith, but I guess he had already gone to bed. I had to leave my car at church and try to resolve it tomorrow. I can hitch a ride to work. I have a hair appointment tomorrow in Auburn that throws a kink into it. It takes just about a month to get an appointment. I accept that I will have to pay to have someone to open it, but man, I HATE wasting money. I might as well roll down the window and throw $50.00 out the window. The worst thing though is not the missing Judgement House after church, it is not wasting $50.00, it is not even maybe having to miss my hair appointment. No, the worst part about this stupid mistake is calling my husband. I HATE it. No, he didn't fuss, no, he didn't judge, no, he didn't get upset - but I could still hear it in his voice.

There is a plus in all this. I was planning on going in to work at 6:00, but since I am at the mercy of a friend to pick me up, I will be lucky to get there by 7:00. So I can sleep in a little later in the morning. When my kids did something stupid growing up, I always asked them if they learned something from it. I guess I did. Make another spare key and give it to my husband.

If I have to walk to Auburn tomorrow, I am getting my hair did!


In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God concerning you.
I Thessalonians 5:18a

My own worst enemy

Someone said something to me today - in fact, I have heard this phrase three times in the past couple of weeks. I don't think I could count the times I have heard it in my adult years. "You are too hard on yourself." And I am - very much so. Why? I could give you a hundred reasons. I am a pleaser, I have a touch of Type A personality (not to an extreme), high expectations of myself, and I guess just basic wiring. I am a wife, mother, sister, daughter in law, worker, sister in law, Sunday school teacher, and friend. For some reason, I feel I have to full fill every one of those roles to the best of my ability. No wonder I am so hard on myself. Did I mention I could also be my own worst enemy? I don't think I can let anybody down in any of those areas. I set a higher standards on myself, while sometimes holding others to a lesser standard. If for some reason, something didn't go as I thought it should, I will replay the situation over and over in my head trying to figure out where and why it went wrong. If that isn't enough, I second guess myself all the time. Did I say the right thing, did I handle it the right way? What I shoulda, woulda, coulda done to handle it better? While all this has some good points, it is hard to do everything right in every role in every situation. We live in a fast paced world that is ever changing and expecting to do everything right every time is setting yourself up for falling short of your goal. Sometimes, it just happens. There is a fine line in healthy discipline and being too hard on yourself. Sadly, women really can't have it all. Something suffers along the way - and for me, that isn't a good thing. Truth be told, some of the things I really push myself on really aren't that important, at least not in the big picture. Going forward, I am going to try to cut myself some slack. Some time ago, I saw a quote on my daughter's facebook page. It said "If I didn't make it so hard on myself, life would be easy." I guess the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.



For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace.

I Corithians 14:33

Here we go again...

Yesterday was the official first day of deer season if you hunt with a bow...which of course, Rex does. This means that I "deal" with deer season for 4 looooooong months. I can never make my husband understand that it is not actually his hunting that I mind, but rather the aftermath of his hunting. No, in fact, as much as I love my husband, I love those lazy Sunday afternoons where I have the house to myself. I love that he has something that he enjoys this much. I will never ever understand why someone would leave a warm cozy bed in the wee hours of the morning to go outside in the freezing cold with the hope of seeing and killing a deer. Some days it is all for naught. Nope, never will get it. To hear him describe it through his eyes though, I guess it just has to be in your blood. You either love it or hate it. My husband takes deer hunting very serious. We went last weekend to buy special clothes detergent, soap, and other products to completely wipe away the human scent. He will wash his stuff ( and dare me to touch it ) and put it in these HUGE ziplock bags so it doesn't touch anything that might put a scent on his hunting clothes. This man will not even clean a bathroom during the hunting season because the smell of Ajax lingers on your skins. See what I deal with???


All this can work in my favor though. When I have stuff that needs to get done around the house, the timetable is always defined as "when hunting season is over." This gives me four months to ponder what I need to get done. This year, I want to build a deck and re-do one of our bathrooms. Coming off his hiatus from house duties for the most part, this works to my favor. He is always up to doing the things that I want done after hunting. So, it makes it all worthwhile. I just have to make sure he gets it all done before the fishing season starts up......

Thankfulness - day 8

Today I am thankful for my two grandpups - Fred and Hazel. They are spoilt, but they add so much to our family, especially with the empty nest. What's not to love? They are always happy to see me, always want to be with me, always want to kiss me. I love them two dogs!

Are not the five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God.

Luke 12:6

Real Love

I looked up the word love in the dictionary and this is what I found:



1- a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person
2- a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection
3- sexual passion or desire
4- a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person
5- used in a direct address as in term of endearment, affection, or the like
6- a love affair
7- copulation
8- a personification of sexual affection
9- affectionate concern for the well being of others
10- strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking of anything
11- the object or thing so liked
12- the benevolent affection of God for His creatures
13- a score of nothing or zero as in tennis


Is it just me or is it odd for the real definition of love does not make the list until number 12??!!Jesus gave us the perfect example to follow in subject of real love. The ONLY way we can love is through Him.



Love. In the day in which we live, this word is thrown around and often used when the feeling that is felt is anything but real love. Most of the definitions above are Hollywood's definition of love. Real love is anything but what Hollywood portrays. It is putting the other one needs before your own. It is not always a romantic love, but it is always a giving love. The old saying "you can give without loving, but you can't love without giving" is so true. Sometimes real love is a choice. Some days you don't feel like you love, so you have to choose to love. True love always begins with a decision and maintained by decisions. We may start off with attraction, but attraction is not love. It may initiate a relationship, but it will not sustain. it. Just look at most Hollywood romances. They "love" when they really mean "until the next one comes along." I love to hear my husband tell me he loves me, but what means the most is when he shows me he loves me. When we truly love someone, it manifests itself in giving. Real love does not depend on feelings, moods, or emotions because these change can change from day to day or even hour to hour. It is deeply rooted in a decision to love, no matter what. No matter if it is reciprocated or not. Whether it is deserved or not. All loving relationships grow out of sacrifice. Putting the other one first- even if you don't feel like it. When you feel like it is not fair. When you feel like it is not appreciated. Selfishness is the greatest enemy to real love and will destroy a relationship. Selfish love can be destroyed when our expectations are not met or when things get tough. Selfless love on the other hand can not be destroyed. When you love this way, you give without any expectations. You love in spite of ever thing.




Real love does not always produce a bouquet of flowers or that perfect birthday gift. Sometimes it comes in the form of a spouse holding your hand as you bury a parent or when they pamper you when you are sick. It is when your spouse tells you to sleep in while he watches the kids. It is sometimes shown when they work the kind of hours that nobody would choose to work. The sad thing is most of these everyday occurrences are lost in the day to day rush of life with no thought as to what drives a person to do them. The romantic meals and nice gifts are really just the icing on the cake - that is not what real love is all about. Sadly, some think if they aren't receiving the kinds of gifts that show "love' then they don't feel loved. This is a selfish love. I have to admit, the few times my husband has had flowers delivered at work, I was happy and proud to show them off. Having the girls ooh and ahh over how sweet my husband was made me proud. I just don't want to measure how much my husband loves me by that.


I loved my husband when I said "I do" almost 29 years ago . I can honestly say I love my husband more today than I did back then. Or maybe I just understand real love better.



Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought to love one another.
I John 4:11

Men

Even though I have been married over half my life, sometimes I still don't understand men. I work with a guy that is married and has no children. He has a lovely and understanding wife who cooks, cleans, and irons his clothes. She still does all those things that wives do lovingly for their husband until the babies come - and men are suddenly forced to start taking care of themselves in some areas. He has weekly "man dates" that allows him and his buddies to pursue manly things like riding their dirt bikes, skeet shooting, playing pool, etc. This week, his wife told him she needed him to attend a function with her and he really couldn't hide is aggravation...well, he hid it from her, but not his co-workers. Of course, we women gave him down the road. He thought it was selfish of her to ask when the time is about to change and he was about to lose his hour in the afternoon. The ladies all thought it was selfish of him to mind giving up one night just for her. Honestly, he could not grasp our train of thought - and this man is far from dumb. I don't mean to stereotype all men, but a lot of men struggle in this area. I mean, there are times that I just don't even ask my husband just so we don't have to have that fight..., I mean discussion. I gave that up long ago, just to make life easier. I look back now and realize I made it easy for my husband, but harder for me. I gave him an easy "opt out" option ( which he always took )and most of the time just dealt with it.


I am proud to say that my male co-worker gave in after much flak from his female co-workers, but honestly it really should not have been that big of a decision to make. When you are part of a relationship, you just have to suck it up and sometimes do things you don't want to do for the sole purpose of supporting your mate. And they say women are hard to understand....honestly, just tell us we're beautiful and give us chocolate. How hard it that?

Whosoever findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord.
Proverbs 18:22

Thankfulness - day 4

Today I am thankful for my youngest daughter, Jamie. Jamie came into this world with a smile on her face. She had enough imagination for six kids. Jamie was never shy - in fact, you had to worry with her that she would take off with any stranger. All you had to do to nab her was offer her a kitty and she would follow you anywhere. Jamie was easy going and easy to parent. I never had to make sure Jamie studied or did her best, because she put enough pressure on herself to excel in school. There is something about the baby of the family that will always hold a special place in your heart. To this day, she will still plop in her mama's lap and I am thankful for that. Jamie is a math teacher - she loves her job and her kids. I had my doubts about her going in that field, but she has a way with kids, so she definitely needed to work with them in some capacity. Jamie came to us in the fall on '85 and completed the Floyd family. I am proud that she calls me mama too!

Thankfulness - day 3

Today I am thankful for my oldest daughter, Kelly. Kelly is one sweetest and most level headed young ladies that I know. I know it is cliche, but this baby girl changed my entire world back in the summer of 83! There is something about that first born child that holds a special place in your heart. Kelly was a very timid young child....I mean even at the age of 15, she would hardly go into a store without me right beside her. When she moved out to college, I honestly expected a phone call within the first month telling me she couldn't do it, - that she wanted to come home....but that phone call never came. Instead she went on to get her masters of nursing by the age of 24. She struggled with what to pursue in college, but decided to go into the field of nursing. What a nurse she turned into! Loving, caring, and compassionate are just a few of the words that describe her with her patients. Kelly is no longer that timid little girl, but a grown confindent young woman. I am proud that she calls me mama.

Thankfulness - day 2

Today I am thankful for my husband. We have been together since we were both 16...it hasn't always been easy, but we have both hung in there. He has worked hard to support his girls and I love him very much!

Thankfulness

November is the month in which we celebrate Thanksgiving. I am going to dedicate my blog for the next 30 days to the things in my life that I am thankful for. Some of them will be big ones, but probably most will be small. It is those small ones that we almost always overlook, but they would be missed if taken away!


First, and foremost, I am THANKFUL that Jesus died for ME! Not only that, but that I heard the gospel and I trusted Him for what He did for me. Jesus died for all, but not all accept his gift of salvation. I am glad that He paid the price I owed, but could not pay. Thankful that there is nothing I had to do (but trust) to earn it, thankful there is nothing I have to do to keep it, and thankful that there is nothing that I can do to lose it. When He was on the cross, I was on His mind.


Let us come before his presence with thanksgiving, and make a joyful noise unto him with psalms.


Psalms 95:2

Girls Night Out

I had a good friend turn 50 last week. She dreaded her birthday so much, that she took the day off so she didn't have to deal with it publicly at work I guess. We made her deal with it the next day and celebrated with a dozen of Gigi cupcakes. That in itself is worth turning 50. She decided that we need to have a girls night out this past weekend that turned into an all day and half the night outing. We had so much fun - we did a lot of shopping and eating. We ate at Applebees for lunch and celebrated at Bonefish that night. Just what was needed to help her coast into her 50's. She may have turned 50, but at heart she is still that 20 something girl to me. Only better.

Worrying

Mothers. We worry. A lot. I think for mothers, worrying starts when we see that little positive line on the pregnancy test. We immediately start worrying about their health, their development, miscarriages, and our abilities as a mom. Will we be a good mom? Will we know what to do?

Then we deliver our precious babies and another set of worries are born as well. For the first 3 months, we worry about Sudden Infant Death syndrome. We worry about their formula, new eating habits, are they developing on time?? Are we making a mistake by working out side the home?

Then we put these babies on a big yellow school bus and now we have a new set of worries. Will they get bullied, will they make friends, will they excel academically? No sooner than they start 1st grade, we start worry about college. Will they get accepted into a good one? Will they move hundreds of miles away?

As they grow, we worry about their friends, who they will bring home to date, outside influences, and grades. I will never forget that sinking feeling I felt when each one of my daughters drove off by themselves with that brand new drivers license that gave them the confidence that they could handle anything on the road. We worry when they move out for the first time for college. How will they make it without me reminding them to set the alarm or to remind them to do their homework? How will they survive all those temptations without me to set the guidelines and boundaries? How can they possibly stay fed without me buying groceries and cooking for them? If you had girls like mine, how are they going to keep the health department from shutting them down?

Then we start worrying about who they will marry. Thank goodness, when they get married, the worry stops....right? Sadly, I found this not to be the case. It actually multiplies your worries by adding another person to the equation to worry about. I can't even imagine when I get grand babies. I will have to get up earlier each day just to fit all that worrying in on any given day.

Worrying is almost a full time job for mothers. That is where faith comes in. I have to remind myself constantly that God loves my girls more than I do. He can be with them 24/7 even when I can't. He can see down the road and around the bend where as I can't. My girls lives is one of my motivations of living right before God. I want to live my life in such a way that when my girls call me to request prayers for themselves or someone else, I can. I don't want my life to be a hindrance to God from hearing and answering my prayers for the sake of my children. I wish I could say that I achieve this every single day. The sad truth is, I fail God each and every day in some way.

For this mother, my love for my children is a constant reminder of how much I need to rely on Him. How much I need Him. How much my girls need me to need Him.


If I hide regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear me.
Psalms 66:18

I was born in a small town.....

Well, I don't know if I was really born in a small town. Being an Air Force brat, I was born in Blytheville, Arkansas - but since I was 10, I have lived in a small town. Tallassee to be exact. I don't know anything but small town living. During my younger years, I yearned to grow up and live in a bigger city. Not Atlanta big, but definitely not Tallassee small. Turns out, I fell for a small town guy in my own class and the rest is history. I have a sister in law that has lived in large cities all her life (think Denver and Seattle). For a small period, she and my brother moved to Kent, Alabama. Kent makes Tallassee look like the capital of Alabama. One red light and one store small. It liked to drove her crazy - so I guess it is a matter of what you get used to. I just don't think I could handle the big city. I have a friend that moved to Atlanta and she talked about how long the drive was to work. We are not talking alot of distance, it just depended on how many accidents were on the road that day. Nope, I don't think I would handle that too well. Anybody that knows me, knows I am a clock watcher. That would just be too much stress. I like knowing that I can run to Walmart and if I don't get behind somebody slow poking (not alot of passing on small town roads) I can go and get back in around 30 minutes. My girls also benefited from a small town. Everybody knew everybody. They went to school in classes that weren't too big. Jamie had one of the biggest graduating classes that had come through THS in awhile...123 students.


To me the best part of being from a small town is the sense of caring. Not too long ago, we had a brutal attack on a beloved elderly couple in our city. For a moment in time, that was what everybody had on their mind. You couldn't go anywhere without hearing about this couple. There is no way of ever knowing this side of heaven how many prayers went up from the small town of Tallassee on behalf of this family. Just watch when someone dies in our small town - the town's arms are opened up to the grieving family. Come to our Relay for Life and you will be astonished how much money our small town can raise. Come to a football game and you might find yourself standing due to not being able to find a seat. Tallassee does Homecoming right. It starts on Thursday nights and finishes up on a Saturday night. Most spouses of returning graduates are usually astonished how much goes into making Homecoming special for the current graduates and the returning graduates.

Small town spirit is alive and strong. No matter how hard you try, it just can't be duplicated in big cites. Maybe they are just too big to get to know people. In a small town, there is a sense of belonging and knowing people, even if it's just a little bit. I know some people, only by seeing them in and about my small town.

Ahhh, small town living. Oh, thats probably where they'll bury me.

A city that is set on a hill cannot be hid.

Matthew 5:14b

Having a WOW moment

I don't normally have many "wow" moments. Maybe due to my age or maybe it's the society in which we live. Nothing really takes me by surprise anymore. Well, I recently had me a moment where I just stopped dead in my tracks. I teach the junior's Sunday school class at my church. I love this age! They are old enough to pay attention and add their input in the class. I try to encourage the kids each week by rewarding them with bite size candy bars for 1) bringing your Bible, 2) quoting the week's memory verse, 3) bringing a quarter for the 10/40 Window Bible project. Recently a regular member brought a visitor. When I was going around the table assessing what each child should get, I asked the visitor if he brought his Bible. He told me he didn't own a Bible, but wishes he did. WOW! I thought everybody owned a Bible. I mean, I personally have 5 or 6 Bibles. I keep one at work, one in my car, one just for church, one for my devotions, even one on my phone. I am happy to say that our church has printed paperback Bibles, so I was able to give him a copy of the New Testament. He was so excited. It made me wonder how I often take the Word of God for granted. I mean, we live in the Bible belt...doesn't that mean that everybody has a Bible? Sadly that is not the case.

My church, Calvary Baptist Church, is a sponsor of the 10/40 Window project. This is the geographical area located from 10 degrees north to 40 degrees north of the equator. It stretches from the Phillipines in the east to the western coast of Northern Africa. This "window" is home to 66 nations and 97% of the unreached people of our world. This 10/40 window is the most gospel neglected place on earth. That is 1.4 billion souls without a Bible or a church. Can you imagine going without a Bible? Think about the things you would not know. You would not know how or why you are on this earth. You would not know about God. Even worse, you would not know about heaven or hell. Imagine living in a place where there were no churches, no church camps, no VBS, no preachers, nobody to tell you about how Jesus died for you. The 10/40 project is ran by First Bible International. They are responsible for getting different translations to the different nations. For every 5.00 we give, it prints a Bible that goes to someone who has never owned one. To date, my juniors have bought 18 Bibles. That is over $85.00 that 9 & 10 years have raised just by bring a quarter each week. Little is much when God is in it. It is also a reminder that we all have have a responsibility to do our part in fullfilling the Great Commission no matter what our age. Sometimes, I think we put more emphasis on the "uttermost part of the earth." Acts 1:8 says Ye shall be witnesses unto me both in Jerusalem, and in Judaea, and in Samaria, and unto the uttermost part of the earth. To put that in perspective for me, Jerusalem would be my Tallassee, Judaea would be Alabama, Samaria would be the USA, and the rest of the world would be my uttermost.

I am proud to say that the day I gave the visitor the Bible, he accepted Jesus as his savior. It was a reminder to me that while I sit comfortably in church each Sunday, comfortable in the fact that my family is saved, there is a world right outside those doors that do not know that Jesus died for them. I don't have to go to the uttermost part of the world to find people lost and undone. People who need Bibles.